Duplicity IC Inbox

[1stclasspuppy]

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Comments

Re: text; un: Peacemaker

[1stclasspuppy]

IDK WHAT THAT IS BUT YOUR DOG IS SO CUTE!

[He loves dogs he's just incredibly excited and also his texting is stuck on caps lock]

[buttbaby]

Fuck yeah he is!

You're hereby appointed his Daddy #6.

After my BFF Laserhawk, my boyfriend Quentin, my boss Hands, and Artemis who really fucking liked him so he got in there first.

[And after a considerable pause:]

And me, of course.

[1stclasspuppy]

THATS OKAY I KNOW LIKE ALMOST ALL THOSE PEOPLE TOO AND THEY ARE GREAT.

PROUD TO BE DADDY #6!

[buttbaby]

If you wanna meet him you can come to my place.

Down housing 002-C.

[1stclasspuppy]

HECK YEAH!

WHAT'S HIS DIET? CAN I BRING SOME TREATS?

[buttbaby]

Dude he just eats whatever. I got him some dog food but he also likes human food, and sometimes he tries to eat poop.

So sure, bring treats.

[1stclasspuppy]

ILL GET SOME BACON FROM MY NEW FAVORITE PLACE, NO POOP I PROMISE!

[buttbaby]

Awesome.

Glad that you specified no poop.

[#Sarcasm.]

[1stclasspuppy]

WELL IM NOT GONNA CARRY POOP AROUND, THATS GROSS DUDE

UNLESS YOU NEED ME TO HELP WALK HIM THEN ID CARRY POOP FOR HIM

[buttbaby]

Maybe later, dude.

But thanks for volunteering to poop duty.

[1stclasspuppy]

OF COURSE! ITS WHAT DADDY #6'S SHOULD DO!

[buttbaby]

You're an excellent dog dad, Zack.

[1stclasspuppy]

THANKS!

I'LL BE THERE IN A BIT!

[buttbaby]

[When Zack approaches, he'll be able to recognize the room easily by the hard rock tunes emerging from within:

"Dominaaaaate meeeee youuuu smoooooth fuuuucker~"]

[1stclasspuppy]

[Zack's never heard hard rock so when he gets close the loud music is even louder to his ears and he winces a bit as he tries to get used to the sound, knocking loudly on the door and with a greasy bag full of bacon in his hands from the diner he visited recently.]

[buttbaby]

[There's barking from inside, then the music shuts off, and the door opens.

Bonehead emerges first, jumping up to greet the Bringer of Bacon head on.

Well, head-to-thighs anyway.]

[1stclasspuppy]

[Zack can hear the little tippy taps of paw feet on the floor before the doors open and he crouches once he sees Bonehead and lets the slobbering on his face commence. He's laughing and drops the bag so he can reach in and grab some bacon for Bonehead. At this rate he won't even make it inside from all the hugging and cooing going on.]

[buttbaby]

[Chris just stands back and watches, not wanting to interrupt the pure joy erupting out of those two dumb puppies.]

[1stclasspuppy]

[Chris might be there for a minute or so since Zack's just laughing and enjoying the kisses all over his face in between the chewing of bacon. He does manage to take a minute to breath and is just filling that time with happy laughs as he is somehow now laying on the floor and looking up at Chris.]

Chris I love him!!

[buttbaby]

[Chris gives a huff of half-laughter.]

Dude. I'm pretty sure it's fucking mutual.

[Bonehead clearly can't get enough of his new daddy.]

[1stclasspuppy]

I hope so!

[Zack was SOLDIER's resident puppy so he's never had a puppy before.]

He's the cutest best dog in the world!

[Zack picks him up and whats left of the bag of bacon and walks inside with them both in his arms.]

Chris I don't think I can ever leave. I love him too much.

[He's rubbing his cheek against the top of Bonehead's head while said doggo is eating more bacon.]

[buttbaby]

You'll have to take him out on a walk eventually. He might wanna go pretty soon at this rate.

[1stclasspuppy]

That's okay, we can bond more on the walk.

[He takes a seat on the couch, Bonehead in his lap.]

Where did you find him?

[buttbaby]

Laserhawk and I were on patrol, looking for bad guys to jump, and instead...

[He gestures at Bonehead, the world's unlikeliest bad guy.]

[1stclasspuppy]

Well I'd say you found the goodest boy instead.

[He pets Bonehead whose still in his lap.]

Is that the kind of work you do for Mr. Hands? Go on patrol?